Achea Redd: Fear-“less”

Achea Redd: In the disappointment there's hope on the other side of that, because you tap into this place of discovery that you never knew was possible, which really lends itself to a freedom that you walk in knowing that you are who you are. And you show up as yourself and people accept you for who you are. And if they don't, that's okay too, because you accept you for who you are.

Michael Redd: Hey everybody. This is Michael Redd. And welcome to the Betting on Yourself Podcast, where I interview successful entrepreneurs, athletes, and other top performers who rose to the top, took success into their own hands, and bet on themselves. I couldn't think of a better way to end this season of Betting on Yourself than with my next guest. Where do I start?

Michael Redd: She is not only my beautiful, smart, and talented wife, but she's also a successful influencer, author, and champion for women who struggle with mental health issues. She is the founder of Real Girls F.A.R.T., which stands for fearless, authentic, rescuer trailblazer, a nonprofit dedicated to equipping women with the tools they need to become their best selves.

Michael Redd: She's also the author of the award winning book, Be Free, Be You and an upcoming book Authentic You, coming out this November. She discovered this calling of her life when she was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder back in 2016 and started blogging her journey from diagnosis to recovery, giving so many women who are struggling with the same issues the courage to get the help they needed.

Michael Redd: Now she's on a mission to help end the stigma associated with seeking mental health care, especially for women of color, helping them find their voice and just let it out. She's a true example of what it means to bet on yourself. I'm humbled, honored, and extremely proud to welcome to the show my lovely wife, Achea Redd. This has to be probably my favorite podcast of the season.

Michael Redd: That's because I have my beautiful, incredibly smart wife on this edition of Betting on Yourself. How do you interview your wife? But I'm going to attempt to do that today. And if anybody epitomizes betting on yourself, it has been this young lady that I'm about to interview. And that is the beautiful, the talented, the smart Achea Redd. Welcome to the show today, my beautiful honey.

Achea Redd: Thank you for having me. Wow. I don't know what to do after an introduction like that. My goodness, especially you calling me a young lady. That's awesome. Just started 40. So I don't know how young I am.

Michael Redd: Yes, you did. You just turned 40. Welcome to the 40 club. But as you know, this podcast has everything to do with betting on yourself. And to end this season, I thought it would be appropriate to have you on this podcast because you have an incredible story, and what you're doing today to help people all around the world has been really inspiring to me. So let me just ask you, like I ask every other guest, what has it meant to you to bet on yourself?

Achea Redd: I think it's meant everything. It was one of those things that I didn't choose, but it chose me. And then ultimately, I just got on board the train and took the ride. And it's been a wonderful ride and we're still going. And it's just been really awesome to be on this journey with you and to see you bet on yourself, we're betting on ourselves together. And yeah, it's super cool. My journey has been about what, four years long now. So we've been going steady and strong and it's been a pretty good experience.

Michael Redd: What does it specifically mean to you to bet on yourself? Marrying me? That was a big bet.

Achea Redd: Yeah. So I guess if you're asking for specific examples of where I may have actually took the plunge to bet on myself. Yeah. The first one would definitely be marrying you. Because I again was stepping into something that was unfamiliar and unknown being the wife of a athlete, and a very good athlete at that. That's always in the public eyes, a very different experience and not too many people can actually relate to that. So that was definitely a bet, but it worked out, it turned out. I think so. You're smiling. You got a smile on your face.

Michael Redd: Yes.

Achea Redd: Yeah. So you better not say no.

Michael Redd: Listen, for you to make the bet on me, it was an incredible bet. But I would go back probably further than that. You've always from talking to your parents and knowing you for pretty much all of our lives, you've always been, I think, a person destined for greatness and we're seeing the fullness of that happen now. Tell me about your childhood. You were like me, a preacher's kid. You're daughter of a preacher.

Michael Redd: Tell me about your environment and was your family atmosphere really pushing you towards being who you are now? Or tell me about the reinvention since your childhood.

Achea Redd: Yeah. So like you, I grew up in a pastor's home. And I think that while there are probably a few positives to that, there were also in my childhood, a few negatives. My environment wasn't really an environment that encouraged self-exploration and self-discovery and questioning things. My environment I grew up in was very much you play by the rules and you follow this path that I see for you.

Achea Redd: Because what I see for you is what God sees for you. And so for me, it was not very encouraging and I kind of just morphed into this person that I didn't even recognize. And I think that when that happened to me, I carry the weight of being someone that I wasn't for a really long time until probably four years ago when I imploded. And you were there, you saw what had happened to me emotionally. Had first mental breakdown, emotional breakdown four years ago.

Achea Redd: As painful as that experience was, I think it did come from me carrying the weight of bearing the vision and dream of someone else that they had for my life. And that's a heavy weight to carry. And so I was carrying that weight for all of what, 36 years, until I just couldn't carry it any longer. And I had grown really weary and my whole nervous system started to shut down. And so there had to be a change that needed to be made.

Achea Redd: And that's why I said earlier that I didn't necessarily choose the path of mental health awareness. It chose me. And it really helped me reinvent who I was and helped me get on that path to discovering who Achea was and what I was meant to do. And I couldn't be happier actually with me taking the risk and stepping out there, kind of like Tarzan.

Achea Redd: I talk about that Tarzan like faith, where in the story of Tarzan, you see him in order for the next vine to appear, he has to jump off of the vine that he's on. And so that was kind of my journey four years ago. It was just like, I had to jump off, jump from the vine I was on of I was singing and doing music at church and all of that. And that was all someone else's dream and identity of who I was.

Achea Redd: And I had to jump of that one. And then as soon as I jumped off mid air, the next vine appeared and that vine was obviously blogging about my experiences with my journey through mental health. And then when I jumped off of that vine, the next vine of becoming an author of my first book, Be Free, Be You, that was the next vine. And so on and on it goes. And I think we have a lot of those vines that take place in our life.

Achea Redd: The interesting thing that just came to me is that when you jump off of the vine you're on, sometimes you're in mid air, which kind of signifies being in limbo. And being in limbo is uncertain and is scary. And you don't know what that is going to feel like and look like. And that was when my mental breakdown or emotional breakdown happened is when I was mid air in limbo. And once I got through that and worked through everything, the next vine definitely appeared. And it kind of set me up for the trajectory that I'm on right now.

Michael Redd: That's so good. But I've often said that sometimes self-discovery is a scary thing because self-discovery may change your career. You may change geographical locations. You may even change relationships by discovering the real. You talk about the emotions and the mindset that comes along with having your identity solidified and self-discovery. Sometimes the boogeyman is discovering who we really are.

Achea Redd: Yeah. And that's really hard when you have to look at yourself in the mirror and not really like what's looking back at you. And I think that that is what you mean. I think when you say the boogeyman is basically your reflection, that was painful. It was painful realizing that I had to fix something that I didn't break, that was really hard. And what was also really hard is in order to grab a hold of the dream, like the dream, and that means the one or the one thing that you're supposed to be doing, you have to let go of another thing, which is a counterfeit dream.

Achea Redd: And for me, that looked like not only what I was doing as a career, but it also looked like relationships that were counterfeit. And I talk a lot about, and you know, this is no secret, you know I don't have a great relationship with my dad. So I had to let go of that. I had to let go of that dream of having a daddy. And that's one of the hardest things to do. Is to let go of a dream of having that relationship with a parent, because it brings about so much disappointment.

Achea Redd: But in the disappointment, there's hope on the other side of that, because you tap into this place of discovery that you never knew was possible, which really lends itself to a freedom that you walk in knowing that you are who you are. And you show up as yourself and people accept you for who you are. And if they don't, that's okay too, because you accept you for who you are.

Michael Redd: You're one of the most courageous people I know alive. It's the truth. You have had a major impact on me and I think it comes from you discovering you. And again, one perception of you was what you were doing in the church, singing, things of that nature. We connect, we get married, and you're thrusted into this whole MBA world, where there's pressures to have a certain bravado and look a certain way. And there's a false identity that can be attached to you in that world. Talk about the courage to not conform to that identity as well.

Achea Redd: That's a really, really good question. Yeah. At the time, that was right around when we got married, that was right around when Basketball Wives, the reality show came on. And so obviously people had a perception, obviously when they would come to the games or they would be at events and they would see the basketball players and their wives. So they didn't really know what happened in those worlds.

Achea Redd: But when you have a reality TV show that kind of shines a light on what happens, and a lot of it, unfortunately it was very much reality. I think you are looked at as like, okay, you're just a trophy wife or, you're just arm candy. And you're like, of course you don't have any dreams. Of course, you're not like ... you're just with this person for what he can do for you. And so there's a lot of prejudgment that goes in to that from other people.

Achea Redd: And so you have to kind of let all of that noise fade away and then you have to really be courageous in the fact that you don't have to be impressive to anybody. You can look how you want to look. Really the only thing that matters is you being comfortable in your own skin. And I think I've always had a little bit of that when we first got together. There was parts of me that felt pressure at times to look a certain way or conform. But all in all, the real me was kind of breaking out and was constantly at war with that need to be accepted by everybody.

Achea Redd: So, it was a hard thing to do and to be myself, but I did it anyway. And I think for me, that's why when we named the blog Real Girls F.A.R.T., which people snicker at it and it's cool, because it's a catchy name. But I chose fearless, authentic, rescuer, and trailblazer for the very reason that those are the four words that really resonate with me and my journey.

Achea Redd: And in particular, the first one, fearless, like we talked about this, you said, "Do you think that you'll ever have to rename it or rebrand it, because I don't know if we're ever fearless?" For me, I think the word fearless, if I had to define it, it would be that not that you're without fear, but that you fear less. Not that you're fearless, don't have any fear, but that you fear less or that you're afraid of something and you do it anyway.

Achea Redd: And some people call that bravery and it is by default bravery, but yeah, I never pretend to not be scared. I just do it anyway. And I think that that's what separates me from some folks that maybe aren't willing to take the journey to self-awareness and self-discovery because it's scary.

Michael Redd: I think that's one of the reasons why we love you, your family, your kids, and obviously your followers on your social platforms, they love the fact that you're so transparent and so vulnerable and that's how you live your life. And I think it's inspiring people all around the world. In fact, we know it is through the platforms that you created. Talk about how important it is to live your life aloud.

Achea Redd: Yeah. So, again, we keep by accident pointing to this platform that I created the blog, Real Girls F.A.R.T., but finding your voice and letting it out. And so basically living your truth out loud it means really everything to me, it means everything to my platform and my community that I've built online. Because I don't really know any other way to be honestly. And I know that that may sound cheesy or cliché.

Achea Redd: But I'm serious when I say that I've always been the person that has been an open book and very honest and truthful. I think there was probably a short period of time in my life when I was lying a whole lot. And I didn't like the way that that felt. And so, I felt like it was way too much work to keep up a facade and lie. So I just stopped doing it, only to find out that people in my circle were encouraging me to continue that facade and to continue to lie and live a lie and be a lie.

Achea Redd: And so for me, it's never set well to not be open, to not be transparent, to not be vulnerable. I feel much better when I am honest, when I'm living open, what you see is what you get always. So who I am right now on this podcast is who I would be if you were in my living room or at a table for lunch talking to me. You know that. I don't really pretend to be someone that I'm not.

Achea Redd: And I think it's also really important to help women know that they have to be vulnerable and transparent to actually better themselves and to get to the greater side of things, to the greener side of the grass, if you will. I don't know anybody who's completely happy and living a lie. In fact, I don't know anybody who's happy at all and living a lie because it's a lot of work and it takes a lot of energy.

Michael Redd: So we fast forward to four years ago. I'm with you in this journey and the diagnosis of anxiety disorder comes into play. But a beautiful thing comes about from that. You start blogging about your experiences and your journeys. Talk about the blog Real Girls F.A.R.T..

Achea Redd: Yeah. So when I first got diagnosed, of course it was a hard pill to swallow because mental health is definitely under talked about.

Michael Redd: And at that point, mental health was not a sexy topic of discussion.

Achea Redd: Right. Yeah. Now it's becoming more of a topic. Obviously because of what's going on in our world and obviously because there's been several famous people that have come out and started talking about their mental health journeys. But four years ago, that was not the case. So I was actually a trailblazer in doing that, which is the last word or the T word in F.A.R.T..

Achea Redd: And so I think the reason why I started blogging was because I'm a writer by trade. So it was therapeutic for me. I never intended to impact or influence the amount of people, women, that I talk to and influence. But I think just me being very honest about my journey. I wanted other people to understand that they weren't alone and that it was okay to feel these things. And it was okay if you have a label that's put on you because it doesn't define you.

Achea Redd: The diagnosis doesn't define me. It's a part of me. And it doesn't matter how terrible the diagnosis is or no matter what they call it. And there are a lot of people that talk to me that are diagnosed with a lot of things, it's hard for them. But what I help them do is to own the diagnosis. And then once they own the diagnosis, okay, like let's accept it. And then let's follow our treatment plan. And let's stay on that path, and then there's a life after that. And you don't have to stay in your own shame of being diagnosed with something that is not pretty.

Michael Redd: So powerful. And then you become an author, which was a big bet on yourself. Obviously you had the natural gift of writing, but when you approached me about it, initially, I was like, "Whoa." And if you haven't read the book, go get the book, Be Free, Be You, which is so powerful and a great foundation of a number of books that are coming out from Achea. But talk about that, that big bet on yourself to become an author.

Achea Redd: So that was so, so scary. And I'll tell you why. Not for the reasons that people might think, more so because it's really easy when you're a writer or you use writing for therapy to write your story on some pages on a computer or a piece of paper. What's hard is when you write your story and you send it to someone to scrutinize it. And that was what happened in the form of my editing.

Achea Redd: When I sent my book to be edited, my story to be edited and to risk having someone tell me this story is not good enough yet to be told, like you need to do more, or this is really heavily ... you're paying them to judge it and to scrutinize it. And when I got my manuscript back with all of these red marks in it, that was the first test of betting on myself like, "Whoa, wait a minute. Do I really want to do this?

Achea Redd: Do I really want to put myself out there like that?" The second test for betting on myself becoming an author was when I actually got the final manuscript and all the editing was complete. And I was about to release it to go to print, knowing that the whole world, whoever wanted to know about my life was going to know about my life, know about my parents, know about my childhood, all the ugly stuff, putting myself out there like that.

Achea Redd: That was scary because at that point, it wasn't just me telling my story. It was me telling other people's stories. And so, that was really a big bet on myself. And then I would say the third and final bit was probably when they sent my book for some reviews and not every review was positive. And I got some negative reviews and it made me shrink a little bit and kind of go back into that shell.

Achea Redd: And I said, no, you know what, that comes with the territory. When you put yourself out there like that, it comes with the territory. And so again, that's another example of just fearing less of what people are going to say. Because they're going to talk, they're going to say whatever. But I fear it less than I used to. So much so that I put myself on the chopping block again and did another book.

Achea Redd: And so it's coming out November 16th, it's called Authentic You. And it's written especially with preteens and teenagers in mind. But I will say that anybody can benefit from it. Because it's really me writing to my younger self as a 40 year old. And I think that that's a really cool take on just things and being able to tell a 12, 13, 14, 15 year old everything that I would have wanted to hear when I was those ages.

Michael Redd: It's an amazing, amazing book. And I'm looking forward to coming out and people being really, really impacted by it. Whatever you put your mind to knowing you for the last 17 years, you're unstoppable.

Achea Redd: I'm pretty determined.

Michael Redd: You are determined. You're strong-willed.

Achea Redd: There. Gets me in trouble sometime. I'm like when Arden, our daughters, that's like nine and a half going 25. And she gives me that strong wheel back that I show. And I'm like, "Where did you get that from?" She got it from me. Because she really is her mother's daughter. And she's like, you can't tell her that it won't be done.

Michael Redd: Correct. And you are an inspiration to her and our kids are like us. But because Arden is really so impacted by you, who inspires you to do what you do today? I know this answer, but there's a number of women, people out there that have inspired you to do what you do. Who specifically inspires you?

Achea Redd: There quite a few of them. So, I can't just say that there's one source of inspiration. I will say this though, the number one source is my relationship with Christ. That is overall my inspiration. When everything dries up, I'll always go back to that because that is something that never ever runs out. And then after my relationship with Christ, it would have to be Harriet Tubman, said to you before.

Achea Redd: She was scared as she could be leading those slaves out, but she feared less. She feared less because she wanted her freedom and she wanted other people to experience freedom. And so therefore, she fearlessly led and so that I love her life and her story. I would have to say Michelle Obama. She is like, man, I can't say enough about her. Just when she was in the White House, while she's not in the White House, I've read her book Becoming cover to cover.

Achea Redd: Just so many different jewels that she's released in her book and things. I just remember the one thing, when they go low, you go high. And so, that's been inspirational. I would say the late now Ruth Bader Ginsburg, that devastating loss this weekend. But yeah, she was definitely someone that I looked to. I've seen her movie, I've read her book, all of those different types of things.

Achea Redd: Because she fought tirelessly for the things that she cared about and I'm doing the same thing. And so I think there are many more, but those are some of the few just bad to the bone women that I really, really look to for inspiration. And I definitely cannot go without saying you and my kids.

Michael Redd: So sweet.

Achea Redd: No, because you guys have inspired me to become a better person. And that was really why I started going to therapy seven years ago, which was three years before the diagnosis even came. Is because I wanted to be a better wife, a better mom.

Michael Redd: My mother-in-law just to shout out to her as well is my wife's rock. And I want to just mention that on your behalf that Mama Donna's special.

Achea Redd: Yeah. Maybe I should have said that. Sorry, sorry, sorry, mom. No, I want to say, that goes without saying, because she's really the strongest person that I know, like that I know. She's endured a lot and she's come out better for it in many ways. And so outside of you, she's my best friend. So, I'm definitely inspired by her life, her story, her journey. And she still teaches me things.

Michael Redd: Self-care, self-love. I know you have some ideologies on that, philosophies on that. Talk about the importance of mental health. There's a lot of entrepreneurs, there's a lot of leaders, CEOs listening and people in general, how important is mental health and self-love and self-care?

Achea Redd: That's a really loaded question. So mental health is really one of the most important things that you could ever have. In many ways, it's just as important as your physical health. Ultimately, if your mind isn't right, it's going to impact your body. So a lot of times when somebody has bad anxiety, like I did four years ago, it starts impacting your health. Blood pressure gets high and then it causes heart problems.

Achea Redd: And then cancers actually come as a result of stress and inflammation and lack of sleep, which if you have anxiety or depression, you're not sleeping enough. And then your serotonin and melatonin gets all whacked out. So it just affects every single thing in your body. And I think that as CEOs and people who employ other people, it's so important to take care of your staff's mental health by investing into group activities and sessions and allowing people to take mental health days.

Achea Redd: Because they will be better for it, and they will ultimately be more productive. There are several studies that actually show that. And I think not waiting for somebody to tell you that they need help, but just assuming that they're ... that's one thing, I don't like to assume a whole lot. I like to lead with curiosity, but I will say that that's one thing that you can benefit from assuming, and you can never assume too much.

Achea Redd: Is that everybody has some kind of mental health something whether it's diagnosed or not, whether it's situational or it's clinical. And so we need to give people that space, even if they don't tell you that they need it. And if you do need it, it's okay to say that you need it. So I think self-care is a really big buzzword right now. It's so annoying actually how big of a buzzword it is. It is. It's really annoying because it's all over social media.

Achea Redd: And people's, "Self-care Sunday and let's do face mask," and those kinds of things. And that's fine if that's what it is for you. But I think that true self-care really is having a proper, and this kind of segues into self-love too, it's having a proper relationship with yourself. Because your relationship with yourself is going to craft every other relationship that you have in your life.

Achea Redd: So to me, that's what true self-care is, taking the time that you need to recuperate from being on a whole weekend or socializing a whole weekend or taking the time to rest, taking the time to exercise, taking the time to get out in nature, getting off technology. All of those things that lend themselves to better performance, higher mental health, I think that is what's most important. That is what self-care looks like. It means caring for yourself.

Achea Redd: And if I do not care for myself, I'm definitely not going to have the energy to care for you. And if I don't love myself, I'm definitely not going to love you. Because it starts here inside first. It all starts within. And I think that's the biggest lesson that I have learned in the last, not even four years, I would say the last six months.

Michael Redd: Well, as you know, this year has been a turbulent year. Personal friends of ours have passed away, obviously COVID-19 has changed the game in 2020, and then you have social unrest, what's happening in our country, racism and prejudice, macro and micro aggressions and on and on and on, what a rough year? Right?

Achea Redd: Very rough.

Michael Redd: Is it an almost a thought to have maybe corporations invest into the mental health of their staff and employees. Talk about that and [crosstalk 00:34:55].

Achea Redd: Oh my gosh. Yeah. In fact, one of the things that I've been talking about as it relates to the social unrest is there's been a lot of conversations about mental or about reparations. For me, I feel like in particular, when you have a minority population at your company, it is so important to invest, yes, in everybody's mental health, but in particular right now because of the suffering that the African American community is going through with COVID, with loss of jobs and income, with police brutality of whether it's themselves or their loved ones, their mental health is really at risk.

Achea Redd: And just the trauma of being discriminated against for many of us our entire lives, the trauma of having to have the conversation with a three-year-old about maybe them being treated differently because they have darker skin. Those are the types of things that African American people in this country have to go through. And so I think that that's huge for the productivity of the workplace as a whole.

Achea Redd: But I also think too allowing people that are white to come together with the black people and understand what they're going through, to be able to have those group discussions facilitated by professionals, that is what we call creating or cultivating a community of mental health. And that is so important and it's a huge investment. And I know it costs a lot, but it's well worth it.

Achea Redd: Because I think that it also will give the corporation or company better productivity in the future. When people are happy, they perform better. When people feel like you care, when people feel like you've made an investment in them, they're going to bust their butt to work for you. Because ultimately people just want to know, they don't want to be fixed. They want to be seen, they want to be heard.

Achea Redd: And if they know that they're seen in their heard by you, and they know that you care about their overall wellbeing, they're going to give their all, it's just the human nature.

Michael Redd: And you've done a great job of having a number of outlets for you to help you in your journey. Just recently you're picking up golf with me. Our family has been playing golf-

Achea Redd: I wouldn't say that. I have clubs that still have plastic on them. That was the funniest thing yesterday, just seeing that.

Michael Redd: But taking walks, exercise on nature certainly helps.

Achea Redd: For sure. I think over the last 12 weeks, I have really picked up on caring for myself in a physical activity way. I think that the endorphins that are released when you exercise, the dopamine that is released is better than you can get in any supplement, any pill. I don't know what it's called, but there's a chemical that's released in the air from plants and all that kinds of stuff that just, when you go out in nature, it is proven to make you feel better.

Achea Redd: So it's been a huge blessing to be able to take that time and do that. And I'm going to continue to do it now to the point where it's actually on my schedule. So never again will I get to the point where I'm not taking that hour to myself every day to be able to do some kind of physical activity of some sort and yeah, just really setting those firm boundaries. I think that that's really important.

Michael Redd: So you have your blog, you have the nonprofit that you established this year. You've been really strategic in taking full advantage of the downtime we've had this year and you and your team have been strategizing for opportunities. Tell me, what's next? You have two books that will be out come November.

Achea Redd: No, just one's out.

Michael Redd: Well, the one book is out, but then you're releasing another book [crosstalk 00:39:16].

Achea Redd: Right. So, Be Free, Be You is out already.

Michael Redd: Is there a potential podcast? What's next for Achea in the next few months, and even next year?

Achea Redd: We're working on that. I'm cooking up a podcast, but we'll see what happens with that. I definitely am excited about the second book coming to the public. I've already started drafting and working on the third book, which I didn't take very much time off. And probably because it was fresh and so I have to live out my experiences before I write them. So that's what we're working on now.

Achea Redd: With the nonprofit, we're just getting that up and running. We're actually going to take Authentic You and make it a full fledged curriculum for teenage girls that I will meet with every other Saturday, hopefully starting in September of 2021. So yeah, I'm super excited about that. Because as you know, I love working with women every age, every race. But to be able to give back to minority girls that are teenagers is my sweet spot.

Achea Redd: Especially when we're trying to educate them on self-care, self-love, mental health, all those different types of things that I love to talk about. So yeah, that's where a lot of my energy is going to go probably in 2021, is finishing this third book and the nonprofit.

Michael Redd: And hopefully more trips with me pass this COVID situation.

Achea Redd: I hope so. I love to travel.

Michael Redd: Well, we'll get it in. I promise you that. What would you tell looking back your 16 year old self?

Achea Redd: Wow. Pretty simply not to take life so seriously and that laughter is good for the soul, it's medicine, and it's okay to change your mind and not have it all figured out.

Michael Redd: Wow. What's the funniest thing about being married to me?

Achea Redd: Well, let me take this microphone here. How many things can I say? Let me count them. Well, what I was just saying before we came on the podcast was these funny songs that you make up and that you sing. You want to be a closet singer and your secret is out now. He wants to be a singing star, you guys. And so that's what he does. That's the funniest thing.

Achea Redd: And the funny thing is too, that I can sing. So he really, really gives his best effort. And I think when he's not joking around, he actually has a decent voice, but it's when he puts the extra sauce on it and does all the little squiggles with his voice, that is what is hilarious. Sorry, I just exposed you.

Michael Redd: Take great joy in that, don't you?

Achea Redd: I do, because everyone should have someone who sings like you in their life. Like you singing everything.

Michael Redd: Yeah.

Achea Redd: Yeah. And your raps.

Michael Redd: Yeah. That's not my strong suit at all. I will say this, you are an incredible example to people. And I think the most impressive thing about you and there's a number of impressive things about my wife, but you have a great balance between work and family life. How important is that?

Achea Redd: It's everything. That means a lot to me. So when the kids are out for the summer, I take a little break too. I'm not doing a whole lot because I want to ... they're getting older. So I want to be able to create memories and just spend a lot of time with them as much as I can. And when they're in school, that's when I take advantage. So what did I tell you? I said between 10 and two, those are my four working hours a day. That's when I schedule everything.

Achea Redd: This is an exception because you're my husband and I made it happen. But if you were not my husband, I would not be recording a podcast at five.

Michael Redd: So you have boundaries basically.

Achea Redd: Yes. Boundaries, lots of boundaries. And I'm happy with that. I love that because that's how I function the best.

Michael Redd: That's so good. For those who are listening, it's important to have boundaries, protecting your sanity, your happiness.

Achea Redd: No is full sentence. No is a complete sentence.

Michael Redd: Bars. Absolutely.

Achea Redd: I'm serious. No is a complete sentence. And I think that's what I learned in last four years is how to say no and not have to over-explain it. Because the more you over-explain yourself, oh my gosh, you gets herself in trouble. Just say, "No, I'm not available to do that. Can we pick another date?" If you want to do it. If you don't, the answer is just no.

Michael Redd: What a joy, what a joy. This is by far my favorite podcast, because my favorite person on this podcast. Achea, thank you for being on this podcast with your hubby and exposing me to the world. I love you very much and thank you again. I'm excited for you and I'm happy for you genuinely.

Achea Redd: Thank you, honey. I appreciate it. Thank you for having me on the show. And it's so cool to know you still admire me. I admire you. Feelings are mutual. Yeah. Thanks.

Michael Redd: This is Betting on Yourself with the Redds. Okay. That was amazing. Isn't it obvious why I married this woman? Her servant's heart and compassion to help people find freedom and be fearless are inspiring. And she continues to make a huge difference in so many lives, not just mine. Well, that's it everyone. The last episode for this season of Betting on Yourself.

Michael Redd: It has been an amazing time. And I want to thank you all for your continued support of this podcast. I'm just getting started. There are some incredible guests coming up in season two that you won't want to miss. So make sure you are following me on social and signed up for my newsletter so you won't miss an update. Go to michaelredd.com to subscribe. I'm Michael Redd. And remember, you are the secret to your success.